I'm not dead yet

When Mindy woke up this morning, here is the conversation we had.
Mindy: "OH CRAP I'm dead."
me: "You still feeling really tired?"
Mindy: "No, but I must be dead"

me: "No Mindy, you are laying here right next to me, you are just fine"
Mindy: "I'm sure I'm dead, really.

me: "What do you mean, you are right her breathing and everything
Mindy: "NO, I'm dead"

me: "I don't understand you are alive and well, why do you say you're dead?"
Mindy: "I must be dead, nothing hurts this morning."

Don't say see, say we.

I got up this morning and went to take a shower and found out Mindy had played a trick on me.  It seems the shampoo and conditioner companies like to have everything on their bottle printed big and bold EXEPT if it shampoo or conditioner, which is printed at maybe 6 point.  Ok, maybe not that small, but it is the smallest thing on the front of the bottle.  Now that my eyes are gone from age, it makes it difficult while standing in the shower to decipher which is which.  And since Mindy likes to try different bottles of conditioner but leaves only one bottle of shampoo, I am left standing looking at the sea of bottles in our shower trying to figure out which is shampoo.
They need to tell you what is in the bottle with bigger and bolder letters for those of us who have lost our close vision since I am NOT gonna take my glasses into the shower.

MORK